Friday, June 12, 2009

A grownup moment

I was on my way to the good Sprawl-mart (the 24 hour one, which is far less ghetto than the one by my old place) and thinking about the first time I went there. Two years ago next month. I'd only been in Salt Lake for a few days. I hadn't even found a place to live yet. But the last Harry Potter book came out that week, so I got up around 5:30, went to Sprawl-mart, picked one up and was out of there in five minutes. No midnight craziness, and I got a decent night's sleep.

I went home--and by "home," I mean back to the hostel--and read all day. It was July. So warm. No air conditioning, though there was a box fan. I had a gallon of room temperature water, and I think I drank most of it, eating Pringles and other junk. Just before I finished it, I got a phone call; the landlady of the apartment I had applied for had checked my references and decided to offer the place to me. Thank goodness, because I was reaching the point that if I couldn't find something, I would just turn around and go back to Arizona.

When I moved out at the end of January, my landlady was so sad. I am pretty much the perfect tenant. I shoveled the driveway when it snowed, didn't smoke, didn't throw parties, didn't do anything. She said if I could refer someone like me to live there, she'd give me...I don't remember how much it was. $200, maybe? It was a decent finder's fee, whatever it was. Alas, I didn't know anyone in need of a place. Especially not a drafty place.

Anyway, as I was thinking about that first week, I was just amazed at where I am. Sometimes I find it so unreal that I live in Utah. I live here, far away from my family, all by myself in a condo I bought all by myself. I've been here for two years! I spend so much time waiting to feel like a grownup, and every now and then I step back and think about my life, and it's like, "Oh! I am a grownup." It's very surreal, I assure you.

I was telling someone once about moving here with a job offer, but no housing, no friends, no family. She said, "Wow, that's really brave." I'd never considered it, but yes. Yes it was. It's a good thing I hadn't considered it, or I probably never would have come. It was good, though. I'm doing good work. I have good friends. I can stand the snow. Maybe we didn't get as much this winter (I'm pretty sure we had more last year) but I guess I'm finally acclimating enough that I don't want to die. I don't like it, but I can take it. That's probably all I can ask for, especially after 25 years in Arizona.

The high yesterday was 66 degrees. Fahrenheit. In June. Excuse me? That's a cold day in November where I come from. Where's my global warming, huh?

It's raining. There's lightning and thunder. We don't get a lot of thunderstorms here; usually it's just plain old rain. I miss a lot of things about Arizona. My family. Orange blossoms. The smell of rain. Summer thunderstorms. (Warm rain is nonexistent here!) Stores that stay open. No Daylight Saving Time (who needs sunshine at 9:30, if the stores close at 9?). First Friday at the science center. Not looking like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man for five months of the year. Dilly's Deli's chicken noodle soup. Sure, there are things I would miss about Utah, but there are probably more things I wouldn't miss.

And to bring it full circle to the Sprawl-mart, the checker double bagged groceries nearly all my groceries. WHY? If you're afraid the bag is going to rip (and I'm pretty sure the brown sugar, microwave popcorn, and canola oil is NOT a major risk) JUST DON'T PUT AS MUCH IN ONE BAG. It's not rocket science, it's brain surgery. Apparently.


  1. Loved this. There are still moments when I think, "what, is that really MY daughter?" I'm probably still in denial because she doesn't say momma, only dada. Oh well.

    But just the same - I don't feel like I thought I would feel like when I had graduated from college, married, moved away, bought a house and had a baby. Maybe I need to work on that - owning my adulthood.

  2. Absolutely do I wonder when this grown up thing happened. When our anniversary comes around I have to take a moment and sit down because it's so weird to think about.


Be nice.